The Weight No One Sees: For Everyone Who's Running on Empty

Do​‍​‌‍​‍‌​‍​‌‍​‍‌ you ever feel that some mornings come with their own weight? It seems that you haven’t even fully opened your eyes, and an unknown weariness is already settling into your body. There is no reason or explanation for it, only this feeling that today you will have to give more than you ‍​‌‍​‍‌​‍​‌‍​‍‌thought, but you still get up and move through the motions because the world doesn’t wait for people who need a minute to catch their breath.

Most​‍​‌‍​‍‌​‍​‌‍​‍‌ of the time, the hardest part of the struggle is not the weight of the burden itself, but the aspect of carrying it, and at the same time, pretending that it isn’t there. You maintain appearances by engaging in conversations, completing your tasks, and responding as expected to those around you. At the same time, though, you have this big inner world where you are barely keeping your head above water, and you have to use every bit of your energy if you want to keep your voice at an even tone and your face without any signs of emotion.

People assume that they know how you are doing because you show them the version of yourself that functions. They see a capable person, someone who is managing and has things under control. What they do not see is the extraordinary effort that is going on behind that facade. They don’t understand that what appears to be done with ease is actually taking everything from ‍​‌‍​‍‌​‍​‌‍​‍‌you.

You have become so skilled at pushing through difficulty that your strength has become your disguise. Nobody questions whether you are okay because you have trained yourself never to look otherwise, and that became both your superpower and your isolation.

There are entire days when the thought of putting your feelings into words feels more exhausting than simply enduring them, and so you choose silence. You decide to carry what you are experiencing alone because explanation requires energy you are already using to stay upright.

Remember​‍​‌‍​‍‌​‍​‌‍​‍‌ all the instances when you felt like saying that you were tired but chose not to because you thought it would sound like you were complaining? Or those times when you really needed some space but were hesitant to ask for it because you thought it would make you look selfish or too demanding? You just continued to move forward, thereby creating a long story of you pushing through whenever things were tough. You made it your ‍​‌‍​‍‌​‍​‌‍​‍‌personality.

Being​‍​‌‍​‍‌​‍​‌‍​‍‌ tugged in different directions by duties, anticipations, things in the past that still hurt you and haven’t quite healed, or by the simple, incessant requests of everyday life, it is normal to have the feeling that you are failing in some area of your life, yet the fact that you are still making an effort, and showing up, tells more about your strength than any ‍​‌‍​‍‌​‍​‌‍​‍‌collapse would.

You are holding your world together while simultaneously trying to make sense of what’s happening inside you. You are functioning with a strength you rarely stop to acknowledge. You are choosing to participate in life even when life keeps asking for more than feels fair or sustainable. You are doing something that deserves credit, and you are doing it with a heart that refuses to quit on itself even when quitting might feel easier.

Your invisible battles count just as much as anyone’s visible ones. Your perseverance is just as valid as anyone’s celebrated victories. You have survived every difficult day that came before this one. There were moments when you weren’t sure that you would make it through, but you did. When it seemed that everything was against you, you still believed in yourself.

On days when exhaustion rises so fast it reaches your eyes before any thought forms, when the weight of everything stands in front of you and language slips because the experience is louder than anything you could say, remind yourself that the strength inside you runs deeper than it seems. You rise in ways no one sees, and your efforts reach farther than the surface ever reveals.

You are carrying more than anyone sees, and you don’t have to take it perfectly or make it look easy. You must remain honest with yourself about how challenging it truly is, and then extend to yourself the same grace that you would offer to someone else going through the same experience.

You are here, still trying, and choosing yourself even when that choice is the hardest thing you do all day. Keep going. You are doing better than you know.

 

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