Learning to Take Up Your Own Space

This isn’t about finding yourself somewhere new, but it’s about noticing the parts of you that never left. The parts that stayed when you were tired, when you weren’t sure, when everything around you changed. Each piece in this series is an invitation to return to those places within you that are still steady, still real, and still waiting to be heard.


You have spent a long time adjusting, shrinking here, softening there, scanning the room before deciding how much of yourself to bring. You made things easier for everyone else. You rounded off your edges so no one would flinch, and maybe that kept things calm. Maybe they called you thoughtful, easy to be around, generous. Maybe they never noticed the cost, but you did.

You felt it in the heaviness after saying yes when you meant no, in the way “sorry” tumbled out before you’d done anything wrong, in how you edited your words so they wouldn’t feel too sharp, and maybe the hardest part was believing that this was kindness, that becoming smaller made you better. It didn’t.

You don’t have to prove anything to take up space. You don’t need to win approval to be seen. You’re here, and that’s enough. Speaking directly doesn’t make you harsh. Having needs doesn’t make you difficult. Taking up room doesn’t make you selfish.

Reclaiming your space won’t feel natural at first. You might question yourself. You might wonder if you asked for too much, said it too plainly, or stood too firmly. That discomfort is not a mistake; it’s what change feels like after years of quiet compromise.

Not everyone will be comfortable with this version of you. Some people preferred the version that adjusted to fit. Let them notice and recalibrate. That’s theirs to manage, not yours. What you’re learning now is not how to dominate but how to stop vanishing. It’s standing in your presence without needing to check if you’re too much. It’s choosing from your own knowing, not their comfort.

There will still be days you go quiet out of habit, days you walk away and realize you left yourself behind in the room. That’s part of it too. The noticing and the returning matters. That’s how you grow, not by being perfect, but by coming back to yourself each time.

This is what that growth looks like, just more of you undimmed, grounded, and steady. You weren’t made to blend in. Keep stepping forward. You don’t have to earn your space. It’s already yours.


Keep coming back to what remained when everything else asked you to change, to the parts of you that stayed with you through the silence, through the waiting, through all the versions of yourself you weren’t sure would last. This series is a reminder that who you are has always been enough to begin again.

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