Posts

When You Lose Track of Your Own Voice

This is part of the “Staying with Yourself" series, a real-time reflection on the quiet, in-between spaces of personal growth. You are showing up even on the days when nothing feels urgent, and no one’s asking how you are doing. It’s quieter now but it’s real. It doesn’t always happen loudly. Sometimes you only notice after you've said yes to something that felt slightly off, after you’ve overexplained yourself again, and after your body tenses the moment you enter a room where you have learned to shrink. You tell yourself you’re just being flexible, keeping the peace, being easy to be around, and maybe, in some ways, you are, but quietly, your own voice begins to slip into the background. You stop asking what you want. You start anticipating everyone else's needs before your own even surface. You move through the day in ways that don’t feel wrong, though disconnected, until suddenly, something in you realizes you have been quiet for too long, and when your vo...

Healing the Part of You That Always Tries to Prove It

  This is part of the “Staying with Yourself" series, a real-time reflection on the quiet, in-between spaces of personal growth. You are showing up even on the days when nothing feels urgent, and no one’s asking how you are doing. It’s quieter now but it’s real. There’s still a part of you that wants to tell someone when things go right, the part that thinks about posting the progress, the growth, the quiet win, but not for likes or approval, for confirmation that what you’ve been working through is real, that you're really changing, and that all this inner work has a shape, a timeline, something others can recognize. This is not about being dramatic or needing praise but it’s the muscle memory of always having to explain yourself. There was a time when everything felt like an act and like you couldn’t just exist. You had to justify it, had to prove you were trying, that you were healing, and that you were better now. And honestly, that made sense back then. You we...

Being Seen Without Having to Perform

  This is part of the “Staying with Yourself" series, a real-time reflection on the quiet, in-between spaces of personal growth. You are showing up even on the days when nothing feels urgent, and no one’s asking how you are doing. It’s quieter now but it’s real. There was a time when walking into certain rooms drained every part of you. You felt like you had to shape-shift to be allowed in. You’d second-guess your tone, your words, and the way you took up space. You had to keep earning your place over and over again. You had to explain yourself, justify your place, and carefully curate how others saw you. Every look, every glance, every question felt like a mini audition, and it left you drained. You had to perform, to manage perceptions, to make sure they saw what you wanted them to see. The pressure was constant, and over time, you grew tired of the act. At some point, the exhaustion became too much. You realized that you couldn’t keep pretending, couldn’t keep putti...

Building Confidence without Announcing It

This is part of the “Staying with Yourself" series, a real-time reflection on the quiet, in-between spaces of personal growth. You are showing up even on the days when nothing feels urgent, and no one’s asking how you are doing. It’s quieter now but it’s real. There was a time when you needed someone else to say it first. “Man, you are doing great,” or “Girl, that’s impressive.” You needed a signal, a green light, and a pat on the back before you believed your own momentum. Every small step forward came with a question mark. “Should I share this? Does this count?” You’d rehearse the way you'd tell the story, soften the edges, and downplay the win before anyone could accuse you of being too proud. And yet, your body always knew the truth. You would feel your palms go damp before posting something honest. Your heart would skip at a message you overthought but never sent. There was that tight feeling in your chest that came from shrinking, second-guessing, and people-pl...

When Nothing Feels Urgent Anymore

This is part of the “Staying with Yourself" series, a real-time reflection on the quiet, in-between spaces of personal growth. You are showing up even on the days when nothing feels urgent, and no one’s asking how you are doing. It’s quieter now but it’s real. There’s a different kind of quiet that creeps in after the chaos fades. It doesn’t always feel like peace at first, but it feels like losing your grip on momentum, like maybe you’re doing something wrong for not constantly being in motion. You used to live in fight-or-flight. Every morning was a rush. You’d wake up already behind, already trying to fix, prove, rush, and hold everything together. That state of survival felt normal because it lasted so long. Your nervous system only understood motion, always solving, and proving, fixing. Now, the pace has changed. Your nervous system is slowly relearning safety. You don’t have to chase or hustle just to exist. Your energy isn’t dictated by panic anymore. This sti...

The Days No One Asks How You are Doing

  This is part of the “Staying with Yourself" series, a real-time reflection on the quiet, in-between spaces of personal growth. You are showing up even on the days when nothing feels urgent, and no one’s asking how you are doing. It’s quieter now but it’s real. The loneliness flares up. Like last Tuesday maybe when you stood in your kitchen a little too long after dinner, your phone untouched on the counter, wondering if anyone noticed how quiet you’d been. Of course, your nervous system still expects a reply. It still reaches for the comfort of someone asking how your day’s going. You've spent years measuring your aliveness by how much attention you receive. This quiet is what happens when you stop chasing that measurement and that part stings. Solitude doesn’t always arrive with intention. One moment you are surrounded by people and conversations, and then somehow, without noticing exactly when it shifted, it’s just you. You are alone with your thoughts, eating di...

Series 9: Staying With Yourself: A Quiet Start to Something Real

This is part of the “Staying with Yourself" series, a real-time reflection on the quiet, in-between spaces of personal growth. You’re showing up even on the days when nothing feels urgent, and no one’s asking how you’re doing. It’s quieter now but it’s real. You didn’t have a breakthrough. You didn’t hit rock bottom either. You are somewhere in the middle of your life quietly figuring things out. That’s where this series begins. It doesn’t start with a dramatic story or a life-altering moment but it begins in that strange space where nothing feels urgent but everything still matters. You’re not in survival mode anymore, but you’re not exactly thriving either. You’ve stopped running, but you’re still learning how to be still. This isn’t about becoming your best self. Honestly, you’re probably tired of that language. It’s not always about becoming something new, sometimes growth means staying present with who you already are, especially on the days when no one ch...

Growing Isn’t Always Clear Until Later

  Every beginning looks ordinary until you realize you’re the one becoming extraordinary. There’s no final version of you. This is what it looks like to keep becoming yourself especially when people are watching. You might think there’s a moment where everything evens out, where you finally feel like you’ve become the person others see when they look at your work. Maybe you’ve even started to hit some of those milestones you used to aim for. The numbers are up, more people are paying attention, and you’re clearer in some ways. But then, out of nowhere, you feel weird about posting something that felt easy last month. You second-guess your words and you go quiet for a bit. You have not disappeared but you’re trying to hear your own voice under all the new noise. You want to keep showing up but it has to feel real, feel like you own it, and connect to it. That in-between feeling doesn’t mean you’re lost. It is a sign you’re closer to yourself than you’ve been in a while...

Belonging to Yourself Even When You’re Growing Publicly

  Every beginning looks ordinary until you realize you’re the one becoming extraordinary. When your work starts getting noticed, it can feel like you're drifting from yourself. This is for anyone trying to grow publicly while staying rooted in what matters privately. Something’s working. The post finally landed. Someone shared it who never noticed you before. You refresh the feed and see numbers that used to feel out of reach. People are watching now more than before. This was part of what you hoped for and maybe even dreamed of. There is a tightness in your chest you didn’t expect. You open the app, reread your caption, and change the phrasing. You’re not even sure what feels off yet. You are just trying to hear yourself in the words before anyone else decides what they mean. That’s a weird feeling, when your work moves faster than your sense of connection to it, when the volume goes up and your voice feels quieter in your own head, and when the comments pile up but ...

Creating in the In-Between

  Every beginning looks ordinary until you realize you’re the one becoming extraordinary. Some seasons feel slow or silent. This piece is for the creators still showing up when no one sees it, and nothing seems to move, but the work is still real. Some seasons move fast and others feel like they’re happening off-camera. You’re still showing up, but it doesn’t look like much. It doesn’t come with milestones or momentum or anything that proves you’re making progress. You’ve had those days where something clicks. You’re writing faster than you can think. You hear your own voice in what you’re making. It feels close again. You lose track of time because whatever’s coming through feels too real to stop. Then there are the days that don’t sound like you. You sit down because you said you would. You try to find the rhythm. You scroll for something to spark it. You stare for a while, then close it all, hoping tomorrow feels different. You keep looking for that version of yourself w...